You have a good writing style! Pulled me in. Not a criticism at all, but maybe the mother doesn’t allude to the hoses or anything…once she said that I knew what to expect. Maybe she declines to answer? Then the mystery pulls you forward more. Nice work, though, looking forward to part 2 👍
Really different story, I'm looking forward to the next part!
Thanks for reading! You’ll love part two. @Miles Carnegie has mad skills and I love where he’s taking the story. (No spoilers 🤐)
Very nice concept, I enjoyed the sci-fi dystopian feel, great job 👏
Thanks for reading! Glad you like it!
Fun! Looking forward to part 2!
Thanks for reading! Glad you liked it!
You have a good writing style! Pulled me in. Not a criticism at all, but maybe the mother doesn’t allude to the hoses or anything…once she said that I knew what to expect. Maybe she declines to answer? Then the mystery pulls you forward more. Nice work, though, looking forward to part 2 👍
Thank you! And thanks for the feedback. You're right, could have been interesting to let the reader discover it that way. Good idea!